While visiting my family at Christmas, my six year-old nephew, Parker, asked me "How does a pirate go on vacation?"

I had no idea, of course, but I was delighted to learn he did so "In an R-V!" Needless to say, we laughed ourselves silly, scowling like the scurvy scalliwags we were while stretching our "R-'s"in true pirate fashion. "Shiver me timbers, matey." AARRRRRRGH!

The following compendium is quite simply more of the same, so do enjoy. Also, if you have any pirate jokes of your own, be sure to click Contribute to share them.


Q: What train does the Pirate take when he visits Flushing, Queens?
A: The R–.
     -- By Chris Mitchell, El Paso, TX, US --


Q: Why did the pirate want to go to the Middle East?
A: Because he wanted to see R–rabia.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What was the pirate’s favorite Elvis song?
A: "R–U lonesome tonight?"
     -- By Chris Mitchell, El Paso, TX, US --


Q: Why did the pirate hate Captain Crook?
A: Because they were R–ch enemies.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What was the name of the pirate's parot?
A: R–lene.
     -- By Kitty Knapp, Racine, WI, US --


Q: Why couldn’t the pirate go to the party?
A: Because he forgot the send in his R–SVP.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: How did the pirate study the heavens?
A: With an R–millary sphere.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did he shop there?
A: Because he could get a ba R–gain.
     -- By Jeremy Shepherd, New York, NY, US --