While visiting my family at Christmas, my six year-old nephew, Parker, asked me "How does a pirate go on vacation?"

I had no idea, of course, but I was delighted to learn he did so "In an R-V!" Needless to say, we laughed ourselves silly, scowling like the scurvy scalliwags we were while stretching our "R-'s"in true pirate fashion. "Shiver me timbers, matey." AARRRRRRGH!

The following compendium is quite simply more of the same, so do enjoy. Also, if you have any pirate jokes of your own, be sure to click Contribute to share them.


Q: Who was the famous Greek mathema-pirate?
A: Pythagoras, he gave us pi–R–squared.
     -- By David Barker, O'Fallon, IL, US --


Q: Why did the pirate keep getting his feelings hurt?
A: Because he wore his R–t on his sleeve.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: How as the pirate conceived?
A: R–tificial insemination.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What kind of animal did the pirate have for a pet?
A: An R–dvark.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did the pirate want to go to the Middle East?
A: Because he wanted to see R–rabia.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did the pirate save up his coins?
A: So he could use them in the penny R–cade.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did the pirate study opera?
A: He wanted to sing an R–ria.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What's the pirate's second most favorite holiday?
A: R–mistice Day.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --