While visiting my family at Christmas, my six year-old nephew, Parker, asked me "How does a pirate go on vacation?"

I had no idea, of course, but I was delighted to learn he did so "In an R-V!" Needless to say, we laughed ourselves silly, scowling like the scurvy scalliwags we were while stretching our "R-'s"in true pirate fashion. "Shiver me timbers, matey." AARRRRRRGH!

The following compendium is quite simply more of the same, so do enjoy. Also, if you have any pirate jokes of your own, be sure to click Contribute to share them.

Q: What was the name of the pirate's parot?
A: R–lene.
     -- By Kitty Knapp, Racine, WI, US --

Q: What do pirates fear most in the sea?
A: Sh–R–ks!
     -- By Parker Hensley, Ramona, CA, US --

Q: Why was the pirate afraid of spiders?
A: Because he had R–achniphobia.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --

Q: Why did he shop there?
A: Because he could get a ba R–gain.
     -- By Jeremy Shepherd, New York, NY, US --

Q: Why did the pirate turn his boat and make a run for it?
A: He was being chased by an R–mada.
     -- By David Mills, Yonkers, NY, US --

Q: Where do pirates go to have fun?
A: To the R–cade!
     -- By Parker Hensley, Ramona, CA, US --

Q: Who was the pirate's favorite Musketeer?
A: D’R–tagnan.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --

Q: Why did the pirate get kicked out of the barbershop quartet?
A: He couldn't sing in h–R–mony.
     -- By Barbara Chiment, Ramona, CA, US --