While visiting my family at Christmas, my six year-old nephew, Parker, asked me "How does a pirate go on vacation?"

I had no idea, of course, but I was delighted to learn he did so "In an R-V!" Needless to say, we laughed ourselves silly, scowling like the scurvy scalliwags we were while stretching our "R-'s"in true pirate fashion. "Shiver me timbers, matey." AARRRRRRGH!

The following compendium is quite simply more of the same, so do enjoy. Also, if you have any pirate jokes of your own, be sure to click Contribute to share them.


Q: What was the name of the pirate's parot?
A: R–lene.
     -- By Kitty Knapp, Racine, WI, US --


Q: Why did the pirate have swollen joints?
A: Because he had R–thritis.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What will the final battle that pits pirates against the world be called?
A: R–mageddon.
     -- By David Barker, O'Fallon, IL, US --


Q: Who was the pirate’s favorite television curmudgeon?
A: R–chie Bunker.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Where did the pirate find an R–dvark?
A: In R–ruba.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: In what branch of the R– my did the pirate serve?
A: R–tillery.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What was it about Crook that annoyed the pirate?
A: He was an R–dhearted, R–gumentative, horse’s R–rse.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why couldn’t the pirate go to the party?
A: Because he forgot the send in his R–SVP.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --