While visiting my family at Christmas, my six year-old nephew, Parker, asked me "How does a pirate go on vacation?"

I had no idea, of course, but I was delighted to learn he did so "In an R-V!" Needless to say, we laughed ourselves silly, scowling like the scurvy scalliwags we were while stretching our "R-'s"in true pirate fashion. "Shiver me timbers, matey." AARRRRRRGH!

The following compendium is quite simply more of the same, so do enjoy. Also, if you have any pirate jokes of your own, be sure to click Contribute to share them.


Q: Why did the islanders fear the pirate’s Jolly Roger flag?
A: Because it was an R–binger of doom.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did the pirate buy deodorant for his crew?
A: They had smelly R–mpits.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: How did the pirate accompany himself on the guitar?
A: With an R–monica.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What kind of animal did the pirate have for a pet?
A: An R–dvark.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did the pirate want to go to the Middle East?
A: Because he wanted to see R–rabia.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: What was the name of the pirate's parot?
A: R–lene.
     -- By Kitty Knapp, Racine, WI, US --


Q: What's the pirate's second most favorite holiday?
A: R–mistice Day.
     -- By Marie Anne Chiment, Drexel Hill, PA, US --


Q: Why did the pirate run away?
A: He didn’t want to get R–rested.
     -- By David Mills, Yonkers, NY, US --